Thursday, August 25, 2011

In the Face of Negativity

It’s so easy to get distracted by the every day annoyances of life and lose sight of what is really important. Especially with a child in the ‘terrible twos’, it is a challenge not to fall into the trap of negative thoughts.
Lately, I have been in a Groundhog Day type daze, in which the days just run together and I am joylessly going through the same motions again and again. It feels as though my daughter has decided to fight me about everything- she has stopped eating, she won’t sleep, she won’t do anything if I ask her to, even if it is something she likes, etc. I am exhausted and my physically and emotionally drained self has gotten a little lost.
Thankfully, there are always moments that bring me back to where I need to be. Today I looked into my daughter’s room, where she was finally drifting off to sleep after 45 minutes of struggling, and I was able to really see her again for the first time in days. She is so beautiful! Everything about her is perfect- from her little toes, to her bruised little skinny legs, to the belly button she loves to play with, to her big head with the prettiest face you’ve ever seen! I wish you could see her like I see her, sweet and innocent. Vulnerable, but so strong already.
I am the most fortunate person in the world. My daughter is amazing in every single way. She is spirited and has trouble dealing with her thoughts and emotions sometimes. But hey, I have trouble with that myself! She is incredibly intelligent, sweet, kind, loving, and just overall wonderful. Just like every single one of you mommies out there, I feel like I have created the most stunning creature on this planet. Isn’t that fantastic?!?
But it doesn’t end there! I was lucky enough to have another child. Though he is still a baby, he is already showing me that he, too, is strong-willed and intelligent. He is sweet and cuddly, squishy and kissable. My little man reminds me so much of his father sometimes, it’s incredible. He is so gentle for his age, stroking my cheek or giving me a slobbery, open mouthed kiss. He is the perfect baby- the kind mothers hope for when they are pregnant: easy going, happy, and full of snuggles. He is, just like his sister, utterly beautiful in every way. I am amazed that my husband and I made something as perfect as my son every single day.
When I’m struggling with my children, I just need to remind myself of how wonderful they really are and of the fact that I am one of the luckiest people on this Earth. No matter how many times my daughter refuses to get into her car seat, or my son has a meltdown because I have to put him down to go to the bathroom, they are perfect and I wouldn’t want anything to be different. It’s easy to lose focus, but I am determined to keep myself on the positive track.


  1. Vivien, it shows just how grounded you really are when you can step back and appreciate your life even when you are going through a rough patch. This too shall pass but all the good stuff will still be there. XO

  2. I REALLY needed to read this today, Vivien. I mean, at this exact moment! I thank God for speaking to me through you. I just told Frank, not even 20 minutes ago, that I felt like I was done. Done with it all. I felt like I couldn't take it anymore: same scenario with my two-year-old and a snuggly, little boy who LOVES to be held. Won't sleep unless he's held during the day. Therefore, toddler acts out to get more attention. Anyway, thank you, again for sharing this.

  3. They're so lucky you're so in live with them, too <3 you inspire me, mama!